Is this private school or public school? and Is switching classes an option?.... I had a hard time dealing with certain teachers when I was younger and my mother had me moved to a different class..... it is not uncommon for a teacher/student to be missing a connection. Good luck

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Tallahassee MLM Discussion Leader

I am sorry that you're going through this.  While I can't speak to the particulars of your situation, I have a few questions:

1. Could there be something else going on at school that you aren't aware of, like a situation with her peers? 

2. Could she be overwhelmed with the academic challenges at school?

3. Is she testing boundaries in other places, like at home?

4. Have you tried different approaches to disciplining her?

5. Have there been any unexpected or dramatic changes at school or at home lately?

Finally, what has her teacher indicated to you?  Have you had a conference recently?

I wish you and your family the best.

is she bored? does she maybe need to be in a more challenging class?  would a visit with a counsler help to determine what if anything might be bothering her?  maybe she feels intimidated and needs to be in a less challenging class?

Yes, this is private school. There is only 1 first grade class, so to switch her she would have to switch schools. Her sister is in at the school as well in the 3k class and doing well.

1. There has been a boy at school threatening her and I have talked with the principal who declares that the situation is resolved. The boys parents were called to a meeting.

2. I think that she often does not see the point of her work and just does not feel like doing it sometimes. They do an awful lot of work, but although it is not to hard for her, she seems to be unenthusiastic about it sometimes.

3. She is, but not to this degree. She is strong-willed, but she often responds well to me if I correct her, whereas she seems to get more difiant if her teacher corrects her.

4. I have tried every approach I can think of with discpline. I took away her Littlest Pet Shop toys, (her current obssession), took away TV, sent her to bed early, etc.

5.No, big recent changes, however her father and I divorced about 1.5 years ago. I am not sure if that could still be a factor?

6. Her teacher seems to be getting to the point that she does not like my child, although of course she has not said that. She seems frusterated.

I think counseling may be a good idea. Thanks for all the advice.

Kathryn

It could be as simple as a personality conflict between teacher and child, or the learning approach could be wrong for her. Unfortunately, it does sometimes happen that teachers who have problems with a child come to expect problems, and the kid nearly always fulfills that expectation. One of mine was (is) extremely bright but very disorganized and, frankly, is a slob. When she had teachers who were neatniks, her habits tended to drive them so nuts they couldn't see past the mess to the fine work she was doing...when she could locate it in her backpack. Another had a new teacher who looked at FCAT scores and decided my daughter was slow, not realizing that she had had the flu during testing week and so was relying on scores from two years before, which of course showed her working at a lower grade level. My stubborn kid never forgave that one, consistently performing badly for that teacher alone.

If you can't resolve the problem, you might have to bite the bullet and find another school for your daughter, one that has enough variety in teachers and teaching styles to meet her educational needs. What public school are you zoned for? It wouldn't hurt to go by and at least check it out.

Tricia

Tallahassee MLM Discussion Leader

Embrace Entropy!

I have had some of the same problems with my son although this year in 3rd grade he is doing much better than in the past.  I also tried everything and nothing seemed to help.  What finally seemed to help was taking my son to a therapist.  She is helping him work on being more respectful and thinking about his actions.  Sometimes it just takes an outside person to work with them rather than hearing the same thing or the same punishments from the parents.  I know how hard and frustrating it can be but keep trying and you'll find something that works.  Send me a mesage if you would like to know what therapist we are using.

I have an intelligent, strong-willed 6 year old as well and can sympathize with your situation. Last year we had a few similar problems. What we discovered was the problem stemmed from classmates. There were a couple other children that were mean to her (one boy was especially nasty). My DD is an only child and has always been a good communicator but the other children in her class used actions instead of words and those actions were normally violent when they became angry or frustrated. We switched schools and the problem has not persisted. She enjoys school now, loves her teacher and has made lots of friends.

One thing I always make a point to do is talk to the teacher (email, parent teacher conference, etc at least once a month if not more). Have you asked her what she thinks the problem is and seen if she has any ideas on how to fix it?

 Keep your chin up!

Candice

Tallahassee MLM Discussion Leader

This article about kids acting out in school should help shed some light on your situation.